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GRAN TURISMO 3
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GRAN TURISMO 6
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GRAN TURISMO 7
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GRAN TURISMO CONCEPT: TOKYO-GENEVA 2002
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GRAN TURISMO 4: PROLOGUE
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GRAN TURISMO: THE MOVIE
As you most likely noticed on a credible website, ther.... what? Are you saying this site isn't 'credible'? I think it is INCREDIBLE. How uncredibleity mean of you to say such incredibalisticly unincredible incredibilisms about this incredibililitibillitony ... uh... thing? I ... yeah. What?

Do you mind if i start again? Thanks. :) (i do realise you just said 'yes', but i'm ignoring that answer and pushing ahead anyway)

Okay, take two. You may already have read about Sony Pictures deciding to create a Gran Turismo movie with producers Mike De Luca and Dana Brunetti, who have made other movies that aren't Gran Turismo, mainly because this would be the first Gran Turismo movie so they can't exactly have made Gran Turismo movies before since none exist at the moment! Jeez. Why do i have to explain things in so much detail all the time!? It's like you understand it perfectly, but i have to go overboard detailing everything so that i understand i... uhuh... ah dammit. :( The truth is out.

I've got one word to say, and one word only.

PEANUTBUTTER.

WHAT WE KNOW SO FAR

1. A movie is being made about Gran Turismo.

2. See fact 1, above.

WHAT THE GTSC THINKS THE MOVIE WILL BE LIKE (*COLLECTIVE 'GROAN' FROM THE AUDIENCE IS HEARD*)

Little Timmy (38 years old) has for years (37 years) played with his little Matchbox cars (the movie credits Matchbox as the little cars, but in reality the majority of cars in the movie have never even been made by Matchbox). Until one day after an incredible lightning storm (it really was, you shoulda seen it, it was incredible!), they all turn into real cars (while staying the same size somehow - you and i both know movies can get a bit confusing at times).

The imaginary people who drove these tiny cars in big Little Timmys head for so long are transmorpherized into actual tiny little people who actually drive the actual small cars that you actually see transforming into real cars during the first four hours of the movie (Ben Hur is a 'quick' movie to watch compared to Gran Turismo). Of course, they think nothing of it and carry on as normal, thinking that Timmy is guiding them around as per usual.

In reality he's tucked up into his little racecar cot/crib/babies-bed-for-babies (or whatever you call it) he got on his first birthday (and he wonders why he has posture problems...) dreaming about playing with his toy cars while he's pretending to drive them (small big Little Timmy who drives the little cars in big Little Timmys head has no posture problems in the small world, as he never stops driving his cars around).

After a while the actual tiny little people come to realise that Little Timmy has not woken up yet from his regular eight hour and 47 minute sleep (the whole sleep/oversleep is documented in the movie - you honestly didn't think this would be a short movie did you? Are you sure you're familiar with the GT series?). How they come to realise that big Little Timmy is 'controlling' them is never mentioned in the movie, a major oversight.

Carrying on... small big Little Timmy rallies all the troops, then tells them to go away when he realise's they are actual troops instead of the other actual tiny little people. He got his actualities mixed up again, he's always doing that (one day he was driving his actual imaginary Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec '93 when he came to notice that it wasn't the actual imaginary Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec N1 '93 - quite a common mistake, but one he makes rather too often).
After the actual actual tiny little people are rallyed (who pulled up in Mitsubishi EVO's, Impreza WRX's, Ford Focus's, Audi Quattro's, and even a Ford RS200) they gather around Jenkins, the Gran Turismo kitty cat, and pat him for a while. After two days (real time) of doing this, small big Little Timmy remembers why he gathered everyone up, so he proceeds to announce to everyone that from one and a half days ago there is now a restriction on patting Jenkins due to OOOJTGTKCWIMHLTMF (Occupational Overpatting Of Jenkins The Gran Turismo Kitty Cat Which Is Making Him Loose Too Much Fluff).
Sadly, too little too late. Jenkins only has 37 strains of fluff left on his body.

Fourty-three days later (real time, as you should realise by now) big Little Timmy FINALLY wakes up and sees all the actual fake toy cars are now actual real small cars. Satisfied that they are doing a great job of driving themselves around (without once questioning how they came alive), he curls back up into the really actually small cot/crib/small-bed-for-small-people-who-aren't-old-yet (or whatever you call it) and has a well deserved sleep (i'm not sure why it is well deserved either, since he just woke up after sleeping for over 45 days!).

On the 31st of every month (even February, and other months that don't have 31 days) there is always a huge gathering of cars for the Monthannual (annually, every month) GTG (not Got To Go, surely you can hold on a bit longer - the movie is past the halfway mark now?), or Gran Turismo Gathering, meeting held at the imaginary Midfield Raceway, which is now a real Midfield Raceway, just on a small scale since the cars and people are small too thanks to that infamous incredible lightning storm (flashback is shown for the next 24 minutes, even though the actual event at the start of the movie only went for 8 minutes).

At this months meeting, on the 36th of October, it is the events' 431st meeting, which results in a huge celebration (i'm not sure why either, its not exactly a significant number like 500, or 444.4 1/2) and a lot of cars coming out of the woodwork (literally - big Little Timmy keeps all his cars in a large wooden chest, with multiple levels like a carpark).
Rarities like the Weigert Vector W8 Twin Turbo, Venturi Atlantique 400GT, R30 Nissan Skyline Silhouette Formula and R33 Skyline GT-R GT Unisia Jecs, Ford Ka and GT90, Dodge Intrepid GS, BMW 840Ci Sports, Suzuki Cultus Pikes Peak version, a couple Tommy Kaira's and a TRD 3000GT all turn up for the special occasion and all set hot laps of the track (because it was a really cold day, so they wanted to keep warm).

The celebrations were probably the most action packed sequences in the entire movie, with a simply huge variety of cars, at least 12, getting screen time and is likely the part most people will forget about the quickest, because the movie is just that long.

Anyway to cut a long story short (and to be honest, the movie started getting a bit ridiculous from then onwards). Little Timmy wakes up at long last from his so called 'deserved' sleep, on the eve of his 54th birthday (you should know by now that yes, the movie has gone on for over 16 years already - reducing the need for any sequels you'd think...). After grabbing a bite to eat, which was a blatant plug for SubWay's new Heart sandwich (lots of cheese, thick fatty beef patties, loads of sour cream, a disturbing amount of peanut butter, dried apricots and 14 slices of raw pumpkin) he went back into the room and sat down with his meal in his cot/crib/oversized-Barbie-doll-bed-but-for-humans-who-don't-yet-go-to-school (or whatever you call it) to simply watch his 'creations' (imaginary people who are now actual tiny little people).
That was the last time you saw big Little Timmy in the movie, as another lightning strike hit a few minutes later which made all the little cars and people become real life giants (the cars were about the size of a huge oil tanker ship), to which they all then decided to take over the world and turn it into a giant race track.

After wreaking havoc for about an hour they came to realise (again, i have no idea how) that there is no-one left on the planet because they all took off to Mars in their space pods (which were actually every single automobile in disguise, apart from the toy ones which became small actual cars, then giant actual cars) so they parked up and then headed back to Midfield Raceway where they proceeded to have a demolition derby with each other until the track collapsed on itself, burying everything and everyone, including the entire planet. Kinda like a black hole, but the only thing remaining... was small big giant Little Timmy, in his Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec '93. The last line in the movie was by him, saying "I've done it again! I was meant to get the N1 version of my Nissan Skyline GT-R V-spec '93! This means only one thing. I will head to Mars, and take back what is mine..."

Yes, it sounded like that meant there was going to be a sequel...

Personally i can't wait!!

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